At 29...

I always say life is a choice. You choose what food to eat, what clothes you'd wear, where to go.. You choose the career you want to pursue, the people you would consider as friends, You choose the person that you think would best fit the missing piece of your heart. Life cannot just be a yes or a no, for me there will always be a reason for every event, there will always a reason behind every joy or every tear..

As you all know I am experiencing the "birthday blues". Yes, it always happen to me weeks before my birthday.. Its not that I am worried about my age, I guess I tend to think about the things that happened to me. Where am I at the social ladder right now? Is my love life smooth sailing? How is my relationship with my family? What about my career, am I walking on the right path?

Being miss independent for over 6 years now, sometimes I wished I was still living with my family. There are a lot of things I missed. I was not able to see my sisters grow, I wasn't there to see the happiness in my sister's eyes when she received her medals.. I wasn't around to fight for my sister who was being bullied by her classmate..  I missed a lot of birthdays and Holidays. It saddens me when I realized that my sisters only knew me by name, that's it..

Friends, I divide them into two parts. Seasonal friends and For keeps. I have a couple of super close friends, those who stood by side when everyone was throwing tomatoes at me. These people who supported all through out the darkest moment of my life and kept me sane . They were the ones who told me not to bother the people who was trying to pull me down.  Thank you will never be enough to express my gratitude towards them. Without my friends for keeps, I would be a goner.

Of course, I also learned a couple from my seasonal friends. My drinking buddies, some office mates, friends introduced by another friend. F-U-N is the perfect word to describe them.

Now i do not wanna to start talking about my life.. It has it's high and low. There are issues not resolved, arguments, tears.. Like what I always say, were working things out.. We'll see what will happen soon..

Career, yeah got promoted. Promotion means more work load, higher expectations, more demands. I am pressured sometimes, I break sometimes.. But that's work.. To be on top, you have to work it! I am a very vocal person at work,  I speak when I know somethings wrong or If someone is not doing his or her job correctly. I am a perfectionist in some ways. I guess I just want the people to understand that If you wanna be someone, you have to prove your worth. me, it took 3 years to be where I am right now. My advice? Hard work, dedication and willingness to learn is the key to success!

I have regretted a lot of things, cried over small things, wished on a falling star, fallen in love, broke my heart, fought with the people I considered friends, got drunk several times,  Was in and out of a relationship, moved from once place to another, hated by some.. If I would be given a chance to rewrite my life, I would definitely erase my wrong doings. But then again, the things that happened to me in the past 29 years of my life were the choices I made. These choices made me who I am right now. All the lessons that I've learned from my experiences, made me wiser and stronger. It actually helped me survive in this vulgar, back stabbing, bitchy, hard, overwhelming, funny thing called "life".