Tuesday blues..still thinking about you..

your giving me a lot of reasons not to like you,
every thing you try to tell me makes me wonder,
if you already know that I like you or maybe,
youre just too busy to notice me at all

all those words lingering in my head,
i know,
i get it,
you're not interested, that's what you've always said
And yes I know I do not possess the qualities you're looking in a girl
I do not meet your standards,
You just see me as one of your superior,
One of the boys, a friend

The people around me tells me to just enjoy the feeling,
Just let it be,
But I have learned the art of control,
Because the more I enjoy it,
The more it grows
I don't want to end up getting hurt,

I know its not your fault,
and I will never blame you,
I will never get mad at you,
Guess bottom line is,
I just want this feeling to fade away,
before I end up falling in love with you..

Thinking out loud..

29 na ako.. Pero marami parin akong hindi alam sa sarili ko. Marami pa akong gustong malaman, matuklasan.. Marami pa akong dapat itama.. Marami pa akong susuportahan.. Marami akong gustong gawin, di mabilang. Marami akong gustong maramdaman..Marami akong gustong makamtan.. Marami pa akong gustong mapasaya,kahit sa maliliit na bagay lang. Marami akong gustong hingan nang tawad. Marami akong gustong humingi nang tawad saken.

Gusto ko makilala ang tatay ko. Gusto ko makasama ang pamilya ko. Gusto ko malibot ang Pilipinas. Gusto ko mag aral ule. Gusto ko makapag ipon. Gusto ko maibigay sa mga kapatid ko lahat nang hiling nila. Gusto ko mabili ang mga gusto ko. Gusto ko lumaki ang sahod ko. Gusto ko magmahal. 

Sana maging maayos na ang takbo nang buhay ko. Sana makuntento na ako sa kung anong meron ako at pag hirapan na lang ang mga bagay na gusto kung makuha. Higit sa lahat, gusto ko maging masaya. Yung alam kung pang matagalan na saya. Yung pagising ko sa umaga, wala akong proproblemahing kahit ano. Wala akong iisipin kundi sarili ko at mga taong mahal ko lang. Kasi kahit na ngumingiti ako, sa loob nang malapot kung utak, dami ko iniisip. Daming kailangan intindihin..

Basta 29 na ako.. Tanda ko na,pero wala padeng nangyayare sa buhay ko. Sana pag tungtong ko nang 30, pag binasa ko ulit tong post ko masasabi kung "sa mga nasulat ko, may na-achieve naman ako nang mangilan kahit papano".

^____^

Just another feeling..

I am afraid to look you in the eye,
Scared that you might read what's on mind
I am not ready for you to find out,
That I feel something special,
For you.. yes you

I blush everytime I see you pass by
Everytime you smile at me
Every hi, Every hello
You make my heart skip a bit
I even dont know why

As far as I know, this is very unusual
I call it weird-WTF-feeling
Im sorry for feeling this way
I dont want to make you feel uncomfortable
So I am doing my best to shake off this feeling
Brush you off my mind
Deny.Ignore. Delete

I am doing a good job, I believe
Pretending that nothings bothering me
Keeping my face straight and disregarding the feeling
It may take sometime for me to get over it
But I am starting to build a wall around me, dont worry
Sooner or later, I can directly look into your eyes
without you knowing the little secret thats hidden in my
heart..

Just a feeling...

Every night I stare at my computer thinking,
Glancing at the door from time to time waiting for you to arrive.
I am silently hoping that you would come early so I can see your face
Even if you don't notice me, thats fine
As long as I feel your presence, I feel alive

I feel butterflies in my stomach everytime you come near me
Asking me questions or telling me you've done your assignment
I attempted to start a conversation several times, just to know you better
But your so unpredictable, so deep

Those eyes that always smile,
The sound of your laughter,
Those cute smirks, your funny comments,
Makes me want to grab you and hug you so tight

This is weird, right?
I just woke up and did my daily routine
When I came to work and saw you,
The world stopped,
And I have come to realize I like you Indeed!